We attended our first "expectant parent meeting" earlier this month. It was wonderful. The Lord used so many different people that night to encourage us by sharing about their journeys. Many of our questions were answered and some of our fears were voiced by others which of course makes you feel "normal". Amazing! It is such a beautiful adventure and so exciting to be part of the Lord's plan.
We also found out that night that the birthmom that our book was shown to did not chose us. I REALLY wasn't expecting some of the feelings that came with that. I had heard others share in their feelings but REALLY thought, "if she doesn't chose us I will be fine. It was such a sweet distraction while Jerry was in India." Well, when we heard this it felt like a dodge ball had hit me in the stomach and I had swallowed it. Gulp! Ouch, that was kinda painful. After my initial selfishness I was able to rejoice with the mom-to-be as she shared their journey and how they had waited 2 yrs for this and after meeting this mom she would wait many more if she just knew it would be like this. Wow! God is so good and it was so obvious he had designed this to be the family for this baby and birthmom. I was feeling a little bit selfish and silly to share with Jerry but on the way home voiced my unexpected emotions only to find he had the same feelings. Isn't it awesome when the Lord allows us to understand the other so completely.
We've done all we can do as far as "getting one more thing done and in the mail". Now it's just praying and waiting on the Lord and His perfect timing. I've had a aw ha moment the last couple of days.....of course my mind went through why not us a couple of times...I hope that's completely natural....knowing it just wasn't God's plan. Well, I can look hind sight now and kinda snicker at how He works. Three wks ago today Pierce threw a nerf bball up on top of our kitchen counters. Well, I (yes, after thinking about it..doing it anyway) hopped up there pulled on the molding at the top of the cabinet (that I thought was attached..ha, ha) and it came down and so did I. I have 3 broken bones in my right foot and broke bone in left foot as well. I have had to be completely off of them for 2 wks and having surgery this week on one and then will have to go in for the other one after the first one heals. Ohhhh, you don't think I will be capable of taking great care of a newborn the first of March? Got it!!!!! Loud and "painfully" clear. I guess this was a way to MAKE me do something about my feet that have hurt for over a year. If you break them you have to fix them! I KNOW He has a plan for the baby that will soon be our family but this just gave me another reminder....Annette, I'VE got it! My timing! Not yours. So for now I will get "fixed" up and be a better mommy to the three beautiful treasures we have now and wife. Jerry has done awesome picking up where I can't. I know he is exhausted but just keeps going without complaint. I am so truly blessed!
Until the next step of our journey is revealed....be blessed.
Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10.....this verse has a whole NEW meaning to me right now and I'm trying to do exactly that. He is good ALL the time!
We also found out that night that the birthmom that our book was shown to did not chose us. I REALLY wasn't expecting some of the feelings that came with that. I had heard others share in their feelings but REALLY thought, "if she doesn't chose us I will be fine. It was such a sweet distraction while Jerry was in India." Well, when we heard this it felt like a dodge ball had hit me in the stomach and I had swallowed it. Gulp! Ouch, that was kinda painful. After my initial selfishness I was able to rejoice with the mom-to-be as she shared their journey and how they had waited 2 yrs for this and after meeting this mom she would wait many more if she just knew it would be like this. Wow! God is so good and it was so obvious he had designed this to be the family for this baby and birthmom. I was feeling a little bit selfish and silly to share with Jerry but on the way home voiced my unexpected emotions only to find he had the same feelings. Isn't it awesome when the Lord allows us to understand the other so completely.
We've done all we can do as far as "getting one more thing done and in the mail". Now it's just praying and waiting on the Lord and His perfect timing. I've had a aw ha moment the last couple of days.....of course my mind went through why not us a couple of times...I hope that's completely natural....knowing it just wasn't God's plan. Well, I can look hind sight now and kinda snicker at how He works. Three wks ago today Pierce threw a nerf bball up on top of our kitchen counters. Well, I (yes, after thinking about it..doing it anyway) hopped up there pulled on the molding at the top of the cabinet (that I thought was attached..ha, ha) and it came down and so did I. I have 3 broken bones in my right foot and broke bone in left foot as well. I have had to be completely off of them for 2 wks and having surgery this week on one and then will have to go in for the other one after the first one heals. Ohhhh, you don't think I will be capable of taking great care of a newborn the first of March? Got it!!!!! Loud and "painfully" clear. I guess this was a way to MAKE me do something about my feet that have hurt for over a year. If you break them you have to fix them! I KNOW He has a plan for the baby that will soon be our family but this just gave me another reminder....Annette, I'VE got it! My timing! Not yours. So for now I will get "fixed" up and be a better mommy to the three beautiful treasures we have now and wife. Jerry has done awesome picking up where I can't. I know he is exhausted but just keeps going without complaint. I am so truly blessed!
Until the next step of our journey is revealed....be blessed.
Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10.....this verse has a whole NEW meaning to me right now and I'm trying to do exactly that. He is good ALL the time!
